Thursday, September 23, 2004

Who Knew?

Recently, I've noticed my blogging life spilling over into my "real" life. Let me explain.

I started blogging so that I could say whatever I want without consequence, improve my writing, and meet interesting people. I think I've accomplished all of these things with varying degrees of success. Now, I've got to add another "bonus" to the list of blogging benefits that I didn't expect.

I was an anonymous blogger at first, but a few family members, friends, and colleagues found out about my blog (my lips flap like laundry-line clothes in a windstorm when I've had too much red wine) and at first I was nervous about what they'd think about my posts. But, after a few conversations, in particular one with my mother (thanks, Mom), I decided that this is my blog and if you don't like what I've got to say, then don't read it.

That attitude has really been a turning point for me. And that's what's started to leak over into my "real" life. I'm a middle child (which explains a lot in and of itself) and I've always been the one to keep peace and worry about whether or not people like me. Lately, though, I've decided that I like me, and if anyone else does, that's a bonus. People really respond to that - in a good way. I've been voicing my opinions, standing my ground, and just saying "yeah, this is me and that's how it is" - not to the point of being obnoxious or anything - and it's been terrific.

So, that's yet another reason to keep on blogging. Cheers.


At 2:04 PM, Blogger Oz said...

More power to you. No one in my "real" life knows about my blog except for my partner. I know that there are things I would not be able to talk about if I knew that some of my family members were reading my blog. For instance, my sister-in-law recently got pregnant, and I am very jealous and, yes, a little angry. I wrote a post about how I felt, and I never would have been able to do that if I thought that she or her family might read it. And it really is hard not to talk about my blog, because like you, I love to talk! But so far I've kept it under wraps, and that's what works for me. It's great that loosening up the wraps is working for you!

At 4:11 PM, Blogger Wheelson said...

My first post on my blogger blog was about how I was moving to post under a pseudonym and leave my personal site for tamer material. A big reason for the change was I was tired of my mom saying things like, "Wow I never knew that about you." I thought that having my Mom find stuff out about me by reading my blog was strange.

What's that? If I start talking about my mom I have to pay your hourly rate?'s how much? I can't afford that since my insurance doesn't cover it so I'll just leave it at that.

At 5:14 PM, Blogger Trillian said...

From what I can tell most people post anonymously, and I can understand that. If I didn't have such a big mouth, I would be too.

There are definately some friends and family members I wouldn't want reading my blog - and they don't know about it. My mom and sisters are pretty cool, but that's about it. Well, except Arthur, naturally.

At 11:17 PM, Blogger Jennie said...

My blog started off anonymously. But since I too have a big mouth (maybe all bloggers have big mouths, and that's why they have blogs) the blog leaked to my friends and family. When that happened, I went to past entries to censor some things I didn't want my parents to read (such as the details of me losing my bra while streaking) but as time goes by I'm more likely to write whatever I feel like and deal with the consequences later.

At 1:12 PM, Blogger Carmi said...

I post under a name so profoundly bizarre that most people who happen across my blog are lulled into believing that it's a pseudonym.

Most of my immediate relatives are so technically brain-dead that they have no clue how to surf into my blog site. So I'm pretty safe on that front.

I find it rather cathartic to be posting as me. Since I publish professionally under my own name - and invite readers to e-mail me and send in letters to the editor - I figure my life's already an open book of sorts. I try to limit the damage by choosing my topic material - for professional and blog-related writings - carefully. My hope is that it helps me pick more interesting things to write. In reality, it probably puts more of you to sleep.

I'm sure my attitude will change when the complete stranger holding a hockey stick shows up at my door one sunny Tuesday morning ticked off that I called hockey players doofuses in my last column. Oh well, they're just words.

At 4:35 PM, Blogger Kate said...

I opened my mouth as well. First it was my best friend, then my sister, and then my sister's ex-boyfriend. My mom found out, and I told her that I wanted to keep my weblog private. She said that was fine with her. Then my dad asked me about it. I told him that I didn't want him to read it and he got huffy. Then he back traced my blog from a link that I'd sent him from a lockergnome review that I wrote. My dad's at home, reading my blog when my mom comes up on him. She's hurt cuz I didn't want her to read it but that I gave him the address. Yay for Family!

At 5:17 PM, Blogger Trillian said...

Carmi, you don't put us to sleep.

Chellee - I hear you. The funniest thing about my mom reading my blog is that when I call her and start telling her about things going on in my life, she cuts me off and says, "Yeah, I know, I already read about it on your blog." It's like a big fast-forward button in our converstations.

At 8:14 PM, Blogger Amelia said...

I too blog anonymously, although I am finding it difficult to not open my big mouth. There is one person who knows I blog, but I know she will never say anything because she too blogs anonymously!

I think I would like people I know to read my blog, because it is kind of burdensome to have to keep my mouth shut. Hopefully I too will progress to the stage where I'm not worried about what they think or whether they like it or not.

At 2:36 AM, Blogger Joel said...

I relate to what you wrote in this post. A couple months ago I started my blog, and quickly reached the conclusion that I had to write what I really thought, and I found that I was actually very happy/scared about the repercussions. The really amazing thing is that we don't know and are not known by our own family members. Telling complete strangers what's going on in my life is nothing. When my family is reading, that's when it gets scary/fun/interesting.

So rock on with your bad self.

At 9:25 AM, Blogger Janet said...

I never kept my blogging life a secret from my "real" life although I must say, I guess this is partially bc I knew some people would never read it anyhow, so it was safe to share. I have one fellow blogger I know in real life, but everyone else is just like minded strangers I met along the way.

In the meanwhile, my friends and family know where to find me, should curiosity ever get the best of them that is.


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