Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Sweet, Sweet Slumber

Saturday: Pitch camp at Rabbit Blanket Lake. I have a cot (v. comfortable), Arthur has a foam mat (he says it is v. comfortable), and the kids share a double air mattress. Awakened frequently through the night by Benjy, whose limbs are going to sleep. This is because her sleeping brother Frankie is continually rolling over on top of her, kicking her, or inadvertently pushing her off the mattress.

Sleep: 5 hours.

Sunday: Still at Rabbit Blanket. Arthur and I decide to take the mattress so we can isolate Frankie on the cot. Children sleep like a dream. Every time Arthur rolls over I am catapulted off the mattress. Until it springs a leak. Then our asses are on the ground. Also, old people in next camp snore very loudly. Their grandson wakes with the dawn. We hate these people.

Sleep: 4 hours.

Monday: Make it to Ear Falls. Whew that was a long drive! Arthur and I sleep in a trailer, Frankie in a spare room in Aunt J.'s house. We put Benjy in the trailer with us so she doesn't get scared if she wakes in the night. Have to share a tiny bed with Arthur. He sweats. I shiver. We both drank too much of Uncle B.'s homemade wine. Benjy wakes early.

Sleep: 5 hours.

Tuesday: I sleep on one side of the trailer, Arthur on the other. Sleep well until Benjy comes in screaming that we left her in the house. Mommy is crying because her head is splitting from the Mike's hard lemonade. And mommy seems to be coming down with something. Benjy is a sweaty child to sleep with.

Sleep: 4 hours.

Wednesday: Back in the trailer. Separate beds again. A little conjugal visit. No Benjy. Good sleep. Feel like crap, though.

Sleep: 7 hours.

Thursday: Leave a day early. Not feeling so great. Pitch camp at Sleeping Giant. Bought some new self-filling air mattresses. Don't really seem to "self-fill". Spend the night with my ass on the floor. Rains. A lot. 99% waterproof. The 1% not waterproof is right above me. Use my sleeping bag as an umbrella. Frankie finds a sticker in the morning that says mattresses must be inflated and deflated 7 times before first use. Will see the humor in this later. For now, try not to kill the messenger.

Sleep: 2 hours.

Friday: Still raining. Decide to keep driving all the way home from Sleeping Giant. 1,337 km. Start at 10AMish. Get home just before 3 AM. Hate and loathe driving. Covet the practical compactness of Western Europe. Shall petition when well again.

Sleep: 0 hours.

Saturday/Sunday/Monday: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Oh, sweet, sweet mattress. I shall never again take you for granted.


At 11:28 AM, Blogger Dean said...

I didn't comment on this yesterday because I am fat and lazy. Also busy. Fat, lazy and busy, that's me.

Anyway, it is very funny. Partly because I can relate, and partly because it is funny.

However, the cynical part of me says that anyone who undertakes a journey to a place called 'Ear Falls' probably deserves a little disturbed slumber.

At 1:43 PM, Blogger Trillian said...

Dean -
Other than family, there's not a lot going on in Ear Falls. Next year I get to pick the vacation and I can assure you that we won't be carrying our lodging with us.

At 3:54 PM, Blogger sxKitten said...

Your tale of woe reminds me of the last time I went camping with my parents - involuntary for all concerned. It was 1988 and they hadn't built the cabin yet, but we wanted to spend the weekend on the property. The plan was for relatives with a BIG boat to meet us there and provide accomodations for all concerned. The 20-year-old tent was dragged along solely for storage purposes. But there was a fire in the engine room, so the boat didn't make it and we wound up sleeping in the tent. There were 5 adults, 3 air mattresses (one with a slow leak) and a 120lb black lab who refused to sleep on the ground.

The highlight of the trip, though, was trying to cook bacon and eggs for breakfast on the barbeque.

My parents haven't been back in a tent since.

At 12:37 AM, Blogger Carmi said...

Remind me to read this entry if I ever decide to tent it with my brood. I think you've scared me off of the camping thing forever.

You are consequently my wife's new best friend.


Post a Comment

<< Home