Things that make me NOT A GOOD PERSON:
- I don't tell my co-workers when I'm going out for coffee because I don't want to have to get them anything.
- Sometimes I throw out my kids' drawings when the drawer gets too full. I don't put them in the recycle bin because they might find them and take them out.
- I think I'm smarter than most of the people I encounter every day.
- I give whole blood because giving plasma is an inconveniently long process.
- Even though I'm a woman, I usually assume that the slow/bad driver ahead of me is a woman (unless they're driving a Cadillac, Buick, Oldsmobile - which are old man cars).
- I feel bad for other people because their kids aren't as cute as mine.
- I think a lethal virus that took out most of the Wal-Mart-shopping population of North America would be a good thing.
posted by Trillian @ 3:29 PM
6 comments
6 Comments:
We can be not good together - I'm totally with you on 1, 2, 3 (actually, I know I'm smarter!), 5, 6, and 7 (even though I sometimes shop at Wal-Mart myself).
And I don't donate blood at all because there's nowhere closer than 45 minutes from home, and I just don't have that much free time.
We'll all go to hell together. At least we won't be lonely :)
I find it refreshing that you have the guts to just come out and say it. Cathartic, isn't it?
On the whole bad-driver thing, I don't think there's a pattern any more.
Slow, fast-lane-blocking drivers: no gender pattern.
Aggressive assholes: still predominantly men, but not by nearly as large a margin as previously. Now if I'm cut off, there's probably only a 70% chance it's a man, as opposed to the 100% of maybe fifteen years ago.
Commuter-lane cheats: again, still predominantly men, but not by as large a margin as a few years ago.
Is it terrible of me that I think my dog is cuter than most peoples' kids? (okay, I know, but it's all I've got at this point, but hopefully that will change now that I have someone that can help me not to remain childless.)
On all the other points, I agree, especially Wal-Mart - I haven't been to one in several years now.
sxKitten. Yes we can be not good together.
Carmi. It is cathartic. Thanks.
Dean. I agree that there are many bad male drivers. I usually find that the ones going slow or who don't look when changing lanes are women (especially if it's a minivan).
Eddie. Yes - I will admit that you have very cute children, so I don't have to feel sorry for you.
Diva. Your dog likely is cuter than most peoples' kids.
Am I not a good person for giggling at that? Especially the bit about Wal-Mart.
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